I’m Not Arguing With You About Beyoncé

How Beyoncé’s Music Shaped My Identity, My Writing, and the Woman I Wanted My Main Character to Become

I’ve been enamoured with Beyoncé from the moment I first saw her tell that man to “go ahead and get gone”.

And last month, I had the absolute pleasure of seeing the Cowboy Carter tour at SoFi Stadium, thanks to my man, my man, my man 🤪 It was my second time seeing Beyoncé live and not only was I close AF, it was the best way to celebrate the announcement of my debut novel (PRE-ORDER NOW) and my twenty-eighth birthday.

The show, as I’m sure you’ve seen, was absolutely incredible. Not only did she sing her hits from the AOTY, she performed deep cuts we haven’t heard live in years, bringing me nearly to tears. As a Canadian girlie who grew up on basic cable, sneak-watching the Irreplaceable music video on MuchMusic Countdown when my parents weren’t home, is a core memory for me, okay!

Over the years, Beyoncé’s music has been part of the soundtrack of my life. From an elementary school teacher putting me on to “Sweet Dreams,” to rehearsing a dance routine to “Countdown” so many times that the CD scratched when it was finally time to perform.

I remember where I was when self-titled dropped and how inspired I felt watching her detail her process in Life Is But a Dream and Homecoming. I’ve written about Lemonade in university, and I’ve made every man I’ve dated watch Destiny’s Child: Live in Atlanta—smugly observing as their mouths fell open, seeing the woman I love in a whole new light.

And while I—and many others—have spent the last few decades constantly inspired by her artistry, we all know those who have felt the exact opposite. They are quick to say she’s too cocky, she’s self-centred, she’s the founding member of the Illuminati. Blah, blah, blah.

And while she is a human—as imperfect as you and I—and I would in no way die on a hill for her, when it comes to her craft? That woman has reached a level of innovation a lot of people can’t even begin to fathom.

Oftentimes, when people are chirping her talent, it’s a reflection of their own lack of self-esteem—their inability to dream big, execute with precision, and dare to take up space. And me personally? I stopped arguing with those kinds of people a long time ago.

They can’t understand why she is as audacious as she is, and I’m not about to break it down for them. But after listening to the Matriarch audiobook (the memoir penned by her mother, Tina Beyincé Knowles), I have an even better understanding of why Bey moves through the world the way she does.

Tina was raised by a mother who was deeply afraid of how the world would mistreat her child and, in turn, shut down a lot of Tina’s dreams. The cruelty and abuse of Black Americans in the South made her mother hold on to her so tight it often felt like she was suffocating. As a result, Tina felt misunderstood, became distant, and was unable to connect with her mother for the majority of her life.

This made her determined to raise Beyoncé in a completely different way. She breathed life into her and encouraged her to reach for the stars—and then some. She supported and believed in her so much, she was even willing to cut hair out of her own head to give her daughter highlights! Is that extreme? Maybe. But is it part of the reason we have an absolute superstar unafraid to be singing and swinging from a horseshoe in the pouring rain? Absolutely!

So what does all of this have to do with The Full Picture?

Well, aside from the fact that bringing this book to life required the kind of discipline and dedication to my craft that I’ve seen the Queen emulate with every project she drops—I named my main character after Beyoncé because she’s the kind of woman I would want her to become.

When you are first introduced to Robyn Carter, you probably won’t like her. She’s a prickly eighteen-year-old, stricken with grief and bitter with anger. She’s quick to jump to conclusions and triggered by those who can fully live in their truth. (Sounds a lot like a Beyoncé hater, am I right?)

She’s a daughter without a mother, and a father who refuses to connect with her on an emotional level. She doesn’t have the privilege of growing up like Beyoncé—with a Mama Tina breathing life into her at every turn—and when she lands in Ghana to reconnect with her deceased mother’s family, she’s really struggling to find her place in the world.

At first, she’s probably going to have you kissing your teeth and rolling your eyes, but by the last chapter, I hope you’ll see that through the tough lessons she’s learned along the way, she’s found the confidence to take on the world by storm—just like her namesake.

Until we gist again,

Jess 🫶🏿

P.S. Don’t forget to pre-order The Full Picture because a fun little giveaway may be coming your way! 👀